Have you ever typed in your desired user-name, say on a chat site or online casino, and found that it’s not allowed? It could be because someone else already has it (boring) or because it has been deemed as completely inappropriate (hilarious). Well, imagine being told that you couldn’t call your child something, not because someone else has the name, but because it is inappropriate! Here are some of the funniest banned baby names, from around the world.

 

 

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No, I haven’t just passed out on the keyboard, this is exactly what some Swedish couple tried to name back in 1996. I just hope I’ve spelled it right, wouldn’t want them to be offended now. The name itself is actually pronounced Albin (don’t ask how), and the parents thought it would be a great way to protest against the strict naming laws in Sweden. Unfortunately for them, the plan backfired as the name was banned anyway.

 

Smelly Head

Well yes, we know babies do smell sometimes, but calling your baby ‘Smelly Head’ is another thing altogether. Parents in Malaysia wanted to call their newborn Chow Tow, which means smelly head, but authorities were having none of it. The Malaysian government actually have a whole list of names which are not allowed, which now includes Chow Tow, in keeping with religious tradition.

 

Anus

If you thought Sweden or Malaysia were tough with their name laws, then you’ve never tried naming your child in Denmark! Parents are given a list of around 7,000 names that they’re actually allowed to call their children. And Anus didn’t make the list. If you want to name your child something other than what is on the list, then you have to ask for special permission. Bossy Danes!

 

* and @

Imagine naming your child a symbol?! How mean is that? Well several groups of parents are that mean, as both of these symbols have been banned in New Zealand (*) and China (@). The Chinese parent’s had a nice story behind theirs, as apparently it looks a bit like the symbol for ‘Love Him’ but as for the parents who wanted to call their child *, I have no words. My biggest worry is how * or @ would ever get an e-mail address.

 

Mafia No Fear                                                                                             

Another New Zealand entry that has been banned; Mafia No Fear. It sounds a bit like one of those user names that hundreds of people already have in the online casino chat room, and so maybe they should have asked for Mafia No Fear 2013? In all honesty though, I can’t imagine the stick this kid would have got at school if this was his (or her) name.

 

There are hundreds, if not thousands, more of these names that are constantly being turned down by country’s authorities every day. If you ever feel the need to call your child something weird and wonderful, don’t. Just don’t.

 

 

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